i cant do anything. i am not mentally functioning at all.
I cant even write about not being able to do anything
i am either having an out of body panic attack or i am so tranquilized that i cant get up.
i really think about it: would i be better off without these medications? the medications to counteract the medications? it never ends, they just stack pills on top of pills.. even if the pills did work, they only work for a little while and then you’ve got to figure out what different pills to take. there is no sustainable answer.
during the maybe 3 hours a day that i am able to do things, i apply for jobs and do interview, but then when it comes time to follow through, i have a panic attack in busy midtown manhattan and have to come home.
this has happened twice in the past week when i have tried to go get employment.
i don’t even know where i’m going with this right now, i just have this blog that i figured i’d blog on.
