It is the days between Jerry Garcia’s birthday and the day he died in 1995, i just wanted to share something about a small look at the contribution he made to my existence.
In my beer-drinking days, before smartphones, there was something I used to do quite regularly, as I drank beer very frequently.
I would gather a sufficient amount of beer to get drunk and sit next to a computer, listening to the Grateful Dead on archive.org. Seriously, I have spent hundreds of hours drinking beer and listening to the Grateful Dead.
There was a time in 2010 when I returned from California as crazy as I had ever been. The only person who would deal with me was my dad, and therefore, the only place I could live was his tiny apartment in Asbury Park. No one wanted me to drink, but I didn;t want to stop (or couldn’t) . I was very lonely, and whenever I could, I would gather as much beer with whatever change I could steal from him, and just sit next to the computer, commiserating with the lyrical protagonists of “Loser” or “Stella Blue”. I was so lonely and a fierce alcoholic, and the music held me when I had no one. Grateful Dead music is emotional comfort food for me on a deep spiritual level. There have been tragic points in my life when I was literally carried by their songs, and I have very close friends who would echo this sentiment. I’m somehow connected to the people i cant reach out and touch through the music, and connected to good times while acknowledging the rough times.
I would have never, and could not make it without the grateful dead. I call it church.
hey, whatever gets you through the day.
