Composition Book part six
Chemical contentment continued:
A good opiate nod is a longer lasting version of chemical contentment than the sweet spot of inhalants but it comes with so much hassle, and requires money every day .
I’ve never really gone too deep into a screaming heroin habit but I did abuse the hell out of Percocet and oxycontin my teens and early 20’s. I once had to kick my 60mg a day Percocet habit , and that sickness was awful. I know why people lose themselves to avoid opiate withdrawal, it’s sheer mental and physical hell.
In 2013 I had nowhere to go except the couch of one of my best friends in Plymouth MA. My good friend was never around at that time, but her roommate was. Her roommate was a kind hearted, but dysfunctional stripper who used heroin regularly. The golden hearted stripper would cut me lines of heroin to sniff every day for about two weeks. It really helped me ignore all the emotional pain I was in to be medicated that way. I cannot recommend heroin to anyone though, not that anybody was confused about whether or not smack is a good life choice.
When her generosity ran out I got sick and thought: “Christ, man this shit would make me commit armed robbery or something". So I did what friends do: stole her Suboxone and went back to Boston to huff more inhalants. selfish bastard activity.
A good junk nod is nice, but what a fucking project it is to maintain, plus I hate needles. I just know if I got too far into heroin I’d get over my fear of needles and be shooting dope before too long.
The problem with drugs is that you’ll always need more drugs, and you’ll easily lose sight of who you are just to stay high
To be continued…
Chocolate is my drug of choice now