Well, it seems like a good time to write something on this here blog of mine, a little behind the usual schedule as I hardly slept last night a required a nap from around 8 am to 10:30. I woke up to a fresh pot of coffee and feel like myself again, and i’ve been getting shit done. I have unpacked all of my clothes and put them in drawers, only to discover that the majority of my socks and underwear have gone M.I.A., how annoying. there are always casualties of every move, and it saddens me deeply to tell you that the color changing Gameboy coffee mug that Good Human Nate randomly sent to me a few months ago is among the missing, also, but it might turn up.
So, my belongings are unpacked, and I feel more relaxed because of that. I also have a bunch of groceries being delivered within the next few hours, so I can stop spending too much money on eating out. I really need to stop spending any money on anything, as much as possible. Before I keep talking about adjusting to my new apartment and waiting for my vanilla yogurts, I need to go off on a quick tangent, wont you join me?
I was planning to look for a simple part time job once I figured out where I was going to be living and could grasp what the commute would be. the only current income (that I can count on) is about 200$ a month plus food stamps. I challenge anyone to try to live on 200$ a month, especially in New York City, man, times get tough at certain parts of the month and it’s a total bummer. yes, you fine folks that read this stuff I write do contribute, but it’s always by surprise (except for the patreon subscribers who pay monthly), therefore I cant count on it.
I was thinking I could work somewhere simple, for just a few hours a week, and have a little more money… hell maybe even fulfill my dream of being able to play the most recent Zelda game. i’m a simple man, I like simple things.
I told my housing case worker that I was going to try to get me a little gig, and she replied that it would totally fuck up my housing benefits and my pending disability case, 2 things I really need (the housing took a lot of work and patience).
I always imagine people criticizing me for my little fundraising links, like trying to scare up 80$ yesterday, so I can get a viable computer for all of my artistic needs like garageband, Microsoft word and of course the hundreds of gigabytes of emulated 80’s and 90’s video games. I imagine people seeing my ko-fi link at the bottom of my posts and thinking “jesus, man, why don’t you get a freaking job”. well, that’s why. so, i have to work with what tools and powers I have, which is writing this blog. if anyone wants to hire me to do something, or has any ideas of how I could earn money off of the books, please tell me: ev.penk7@gmail.com.
anyway back to the new apartment in hollis, now where was I. oh yes, I did the kind of thing I hate doing and set up an appointment for Verizon to come install my broadband wi-fi, which due to a Covid era benefit for low income Americans (that’s going to end next month) to get internet connection, cost me 0$ a month. i’m not looking forward to having another bill, but you cant live without wifi in 2024…especially as a blogger. see, getting shit done on a rainy Saturday.
speaking of rainy, I was going to check out the area surrounding my new spot today, but I got so soaked on my morning bodega run that I decided I won’t be going anywhere today. that’s ok, I can try to simultaneously chill and relax… sounds easier than it is, when you’re as neurotic as me.
ahhh, neurological things. well, I suspect my roommate has a whole host of neurological things that make him decidedly not as high functioning as I am, not that i’m a poster child for the American dream of material success or anything, far from it, I can do things that some folks struggle with is what i’m saying. I do live in supportive housing for people with a mental health diagnosis, so there is always the potential that you’ll have to learn to live with a roommate who is mentally in a different spot than you are. he just talks really fast in a very thick Indian accent and bounces all over the place from Hindu deities to constant questions about where my ancestors are from, all while forgetting (and asking) my name. i’ll say this, i’m a little worried by how extra he is, because you may recall I had a mentally ill roommate stab me some time ago, when he was completely detached from reality. i’ll say this, he is always offering me things ranging from omelets, to hot dogs and Newport 100’s, so his heart is in a good place. I just have to set boundaries right from the beginning , like “bro, please wash your dishes” and “do not take anything of mine in the fridge without asking.
despite some things from past trauma that make me a little worried about this guy, and the lost socks and coffee mug, and living on less money than some people spend on scratch tickets on a payday… despite all of that, i’m making an effort to be optimistic, and i’m usually pulling it off, because I don’t feel like shit all of the time, I actually feel pretty good when i’ve had enough sleep and my belly is full…if I maintain those things, I feel like I can operate at my higher capacities as a person. oh yeah, it bears mentioning that I like myself a lot more than i’ve tended to my whole life.
plus, who know’s, I might be cranking out these little meditations on nothing from apple OSX (the sexy operating system) before too long, just gotta pull together 80$. I dedicate my “digital panhandling” of the day to something with a goal, that we are currently at 12% of thanks to Meredith:
https://ko-fi.com/evr0ck17/goal?g=12 I fully believe we can make it.
