I am on Indeed, I am looking to work. I don’t like it, but hey, that’s life now, isn’t it?
I believe that I am traumatized by my last job and what it was like. I can link that story for your reference. Everything about that sucked, even before toilet paper hoarding and mob rule took over society.
I haven’t worked since then, and that was in the spring of 2020. Something significant happened during that time, as you might remember, a global catastrophe. Everything about that gig was terrible, even before the toilet paper hoarding mob rule took over society.
I’m afraid to go back to work and wondering if I’m even capable of doing it. I have a genuine fear of what it will be like and if it will have the same negative impact on me again. I worry about having the energy, and managing my time properly.
I’m trying to frame it like this: “Hey, you gotta have money! You need money to pursue the things you enjoy doing like writing, music, and even playing the new Zelda game.”
Currently, my budget is the $240 per month I receive on welfare, along with some assistance from my online supporters. It’s tight. Fortunately, I’m still in a program where I don’t have to pay rent and utilities, but I do cover my phone bill. There’s no room in that budget for a new Nintendo Switch. It may sound funny, but back in 2015, I actually got a job at GameStop just so I could afford a PlayStation 4 to play the then-upcoming Fallout 4, and I ended up staying there for years. Motivation is motivation.
So, I’m actively looking for something, even though I despise everything about it (capitalism), and LinkedIn makes me want to take shots of drain cleaner. I could consider mobile phone sales or a similar role again. I think it’s all about not letting things get to me, and finding enjoyment and gratitude in the benefits that come from doing something that may not be ideal. I recently spoke to a staffing agency about working in a homeless shelter, which could actually make a meaningful difference given my past experiences of living on the streets. I’m being cautious and treating these job opportunities as interviews for both parties involved. I excel in interviews because I prepare by listening to classic Jay-Z, which gives me all the confidence I need.
I just have to face the fear.
And now (since I am poor) I would like to bring up the return of the ability to buy me a coffee, on a site that is not actually Buymeacoffe, but much better. it’s a way for me to actually make money doing what I love, and if you get paid for writing, it makes you a professional writer. that’s what I'd like to be, one coffee at a time.
