Oh yes, at this time i am comfy in my pajamas while there seems to be a snowstorm outside of my window, and i must say, the word cozy comes to mind, here in my little place, the command center.
let’s have a moment of silence for the soldier we lost today, the unamed 50$ chromebook. we lost her to some kind of motherboard failure, which makes that maybe the 3rd computer to lose the battle in the last six weeks. it was sad, and i couldve freaked out but i didn’t. it was like “oh, this happened”. it’s always geek squad telling me i need a new computer, i’m beginning to suspect that they are more interested in selling computers than they are fixing them.
please welcome the new workhorse to the team: the 170 dollar samsung, which should’ve been a hundred more, but had an open box discount. she feels solid, man, firm handshake. shiny, solid with a big snncreen. as you might be able to tell the keyboard is fully functional with nice sharp handling. i’m taking to having the whole operation running on android and some symbiotic work between my phone and laptop, i know i could do a lot, definitely a lot more. it’s gonna take a few days to get her all set up, i was going to do it but i slipped into a heavy nap. it was a busy day, i had to take the bus to the e train, to the R train…all the way out to an old haunting ground of shoplifting inhalants. queens boulevard. of course it was weird to be there in much better conditions, i was not tempted to return to old behaviors, but i did have a few flashbacks. i did this whole trip after an eventful morning of grocery shopping at the dollar general, all before 9:30 in the morning.
so what, tomorrow’s my 38th birthday, and i got a computer with some help from my pop. so i’m cozy, with my candy and my snacks,the new machine, and a better attitude than i’ve been having. something happened to me yesterday after working myself into a self created anxiety crisis over absolutely nothing. i looked down at my mind from the outside and realized that i don’t have to let it do that to me. i thought about alan watts, describing our life as just a dance. to me it’s an adventure to take a bunch of subways around the city, i was openly dancing to phish on my headphones on both trains, because it’s new york and you have to go pretty far in the being publicly weird game to get anyone to notice. adventurous dance, dumpling soup (dumplings are my new thing), sweet cream ice cream with waffle cones. letting it ease into a nice hour long nap.
It’s amazing to me that i go to these places where i used to be someone else, a mindless zombie. now i go there and have ice cream, and buy computers. that’ll make you consider having yourself a happy birthday. looking outside, watching the snow fall and remembering long nites outside in this kind of weather, but worse. now i’m fucking cozy, i should just play stardew valley for hours, i totally can if i want to. former dust off zombie turns 38, way more years than i ever planned on seeing. i didn’t have any of this in the bingo cards when i was passing out aside queens boulevard, and trying to outrun firemen and paramedics hell bent on me going to the emergency room down at elmhurst hospital, the place where i saw the national guard supervising morgue trucks in 2020, like the movie “Outbreak”. that’s some sci-fi shit.
we live in a sci-fi world. go to the mall. Virtual Reality kiosks, and you cant make human contact with the dumpling dealer, the only way is through the menu tablets. hundreds of screens, buy another screen, check the screen in your pocket.
she’s got a big screen.
